Sunday, November 05, 2006
WASHINGTONThe Skinny White Guy came up during a more genteel time, when both sides of the aisle treated the other with respect and civility. When his friend from California asked for advice, he felt it was his duty to give freely, regardless of their political differences.
"I'm thinking of getting a few more wrinkles ironed out," she said.
"But the party chairman thinks I ought to get a whole makeover.
"I'm thinking of getting a few more wrinkles ironed out," she said.
"But the party chairman thinks I ought to get a whole makeover.
"You know, really wow them... turn their heads. He says they may not listen to me as House Speaker, but they'll sure look at me."
"Of course the Vice President would have to wear a nitroglycerin patch during the State of the Union speech."
The Skinny White Guy's advice was short and to the point. "And I suppose he told you to scream too... The Speaker is a lot like a linebacker," he said.
"Please don't insult our citizens of Hispanic heritage," she quipped.
"That's a football term," he said. "The Speaker needs to be physically imposing in order to accomplish the job."
"Think back, they weren't lightweights."
"Denny, Newt and Tip never skipped a meal. They knew it was their duty to the Country."
"What would you suggest?" she asked.
"Do you like fast food and lots of snacks?" he asked.
She went on a crash diet in order to position herself for the possibility that her party would seize control of the House.
MEANWHILE
MEANWHILE
The Senator's stand up act was playing to empty houses.
"A Rabbi, a Priest and a gay minister were on the train from Chicago to Denver..." he said to the dead silence.
"Maybe I'd do better at a USO show."
skinny.white.guy@hotmail.com
THE RIGHT THING IN SIXTY MINUTES at
www.5thstoryreview.com
skinny.white.guy@hotmail.com
THE RIGHT THING IN SIXTY MINUTES at
www.5thstoryreview.com
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